Poem #6: "Pass/Fail" Linda Pastan

"You will never graduate
from this dream
of blue books.
No matter how
you succeed awake,
asleep there is a test
waiting to be failed.
The dream beckons
with two dull pencils,
but you haven't even
taken the course;
when you reach for a book -
it closes its door
in your face; when
you conjugate a verb -
it is in the wrong
language.
Now the pillow becomes
a blank page. Turn it
to the cool side;
you will still smother
in all of the feathers
that have to be learned
by heart."

Linda Pastan's poem reflects both on the waking life of school as well as the stress it brings in ones sleep. It also argues that there are two types of exams, really, the ones you take while you're awake and the ones that haunt you in your sleep. Lines 1-7 are saying that no matter how successful you might be in your waking life with passing exams and getting good grades, there is something about it that follows you into your sleep. I think it might be the fear of failing that creates this stress that disturbs your sleep but I don't think it happens to just everyone. The speaker of the poem must be someone who encounters true anxiety or a sort of paralyzation when it comes to taking tests that causes them to do poorly (the speaker's probably me...).

"The dream beckons/ with two dull pencils,/ but you haven't even/ taken the course"; I'm not sure if these lines are measuring how unprepared one might feel to the point where they haven't even taken the course, or if it is saying that the stress and fear sets in before even having taken it at all. In terms of it being an exam in a dream, I think it means that it's just waiting for you to come and take it without any idea of what it could be on or. Reaching for a book or conjugating a ver in the wrong language could be signs of rejection and unavoidable failure that the dream has on you. The last 7 lines could mean that every time you go to sleep, the stress of exams will follow and therefore "...the pillow becomes/ a blank page".